Why Be Ashamed To Be Seen With This?
Submitted by: dunno source via Submit a Kludge!
This is totally sa…OH GOD GRANDPA! – Ms. Fix-It
Favorite Comment: Fixer bob_super says, “It’s working so well, it already cleanly cut a black rectangle out of the picture.”
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“Honey, come look at my new invention!”
“I swear, if I lose another eyebrow to one of your ‘inventions’ I’m gonna go ballistic on your arse!”
I think with this one he might lose his head
When the tractor saw all the work it had awaiting it, it got a little excited.
Somebody has been watching the BP ROV Stream a little too much….
bomb dispersal chainsaw?
bwahahaaa!!!
Is the issue that they don’t own a ladder? Or that radioactive exposure has turned the trees into zombies?
I don’t think this was built because they don’t own a ladder. I think this was built because it gives you much bigger range of motion when fighting the zombie-trees.
Or it was built because the only way to get a ladder to the offending branch is to put the ladder somewhere less than safe to have it when a branch comes crashing down?
Naw.. it’s definitely the zombie thing.
Although when fighting zombies, I prefer the to be driving something with a cabin. I don’t like being so exposed.
Still, it’s a good idea to keep a good distance from the infected zombie blood spatter.
it’s working so well, it already cleanly cut a black rectangle out of the picture.
It’s no ordinary black rectangle, it’s a doorway to Narnia.
I thought that was the black monolith from 2001 appearing to observe a momentous occasion in the history of mankind
Now all I can think of is “Also Sprach Zarathustra” playing triumphantly while the proud owner of this device tilts the bucket all the way up to cut down a pesky branch that’s 20 feet up and directly over his head.
They warned me that the new Mad Max movie was a bit slow, but tractor chases, really?
that minivan has no license plate and there is a black refrigerator in their yard
This is shopped.
I can tell from the pixels on the right and from seeing quite a few shops in my time
Agreed. Another giveaway: the chainsaw has no reflection in the puddle.
Maybe it is a vampire chainsaw.
Seriously though, you would not see the reflection at this angle. The chainsaw is closer to the camera than the water, and that shadow would be pretty tough to photoshop in the grass. Have you ever even used Photoshop? It can’t do everything.
People make millions off of Photoshop every day…yes, it can just about do anything with enough time.
The saw is shopped, I completely agree. The lighting is wrong on it, around the saw blade looks pixelated to me, and the handle looks abnormally fuzzy compared to the rest of the picture. The pole might have been there, but the saw was shopped onto it.
Not shopped! Why does everyone call ‘shopped’ on stuff for no apparent reason?
Some people see that as a legitimate fix. And if it were a vampire saw, it would sparkle.
I agree, not shopped. I’ve seen plenty of photoshopped photos, and this one shows no signs of being shopped.
that monolith looks fake to me
For that matter, WHY would anyone shop this? Wouldn’t it just be easier to tape a chainsaw to a tractor and take the picture?
I’m pretty sure the black license plate cover and large reflectionless two-dimensional black rectangle standing on the walkway weren’t there when the photo was taken.
But the chainsaw is certainly real.
Yes, but did you know that I took the millions of dollars I make off this pic to create an entire army of Tractor-Warriors to fight the terrible rectangles with? I am doing this for your benefit you know.
Of course it’s Photoshopped. I totally see it now…
Because /everybody/ welds tubing to their tractors and adds a little platform to the end. I see that everywhere. Only the awesomeness of Photoshop could add a chainsaw onto the end of the pole, something like it really being there is just too crazy to contemplate.
For those of us who lack the sarcasm gene, engage brain… if the pole is real, it’s completely plausible that the chainsaw is real. Which sane person welds a pipe to their tractor for no reason at all? Probably the same sane person who’d weld a chainsaw on a pole to the end of their tractor.
…the rectangles…
it will crush some of my dreams if this is shopped, please let it be true
This is a truly wonderful idea for people like me who do not like being high on a ladder.
Yeah. When you’re stoned, that’s not a safe place to be.
Yeah. Much safer to be at the business end of a tractor-mounted-chainsaw.
Unless you’re on the stairway to heaven, then it’s a great place to be.
like me for instance.
ladders are scary bad. almost as scary bad as clowns.
I dunno, something about this photo just screams “State o’ Maine.”
yes. or “New Hampshire”. brilliant.
I was thinking “Alabama” or “Tennessee” myself
lol
The reason Uncle Zeke went to the hardware store was to pick up a $1.99 “No Trespassing” sign for the end of his driveway. But then he met … The Salesman.
This is even better than a “No Soliciting” sign! “Death of a Salesman” takes on a new meaning.
that is brilliantly simple
The earth mover has touched The Monolith. Now it must take up tools and hunt for lesser dozers.
Yes… and as long as it is relying on tools, it is living on borrowed time…
The antagonist in the Texas Chainsaw Massacre got tired of trying to clean all those blood spatters out of his clothes…
“Quit takin’ pictures and help me get this heavy black zombie-proof door up onto the porch and installed on the house before nightfall!”
I can’t help but think that this is the saw BP got stuck in the Gulf.
The gulf saw is diamond edged, methinks. This one ain’t sparkling.
This is the cubic zirconium version, for the budget-conscious.
So, how do you hold the throttle open–with the duct tape?
Tie wire, or a nylon zip-tie
The monolith told me to build it!
Spoooon!
It was clear after
speaking withlooking at some of the townsfolk that ventured too close to crazy Larry’s property that his tractor’s amputation preceded it.How did you get that strike-through line?
[less than symbol]strike[greater than symbol]speaking with[less than symbol]/strike[greater than symbol]
Don’t forget the forward slash in front of the second “strike” and don’t include any spaces anywhere.
You owe me big time!You’re welcome!One is unsafe. Stick ten more on there at odd angles and you’re cooking with gas.
Do you think we can use this for the oil spill???
If it involves the CEO of BP bending over in front of it, I’m all for it.
It’s the high cost of maintenance that keeps you from seeing a lot of poison ivy topiary these days.
Scene from “The Money Pit II”
spot weld directly to the bucket? please…
would have welded a larger diameter, short, pipe to the top of the bucket
and fit the pipe with the chainsaw on it to the short pipe.
bad kludge! no doughnut!
Wait, there’s a right wrong way to do this?
well… a better way…
Welding? Why not drill a hole and use bolts so you can just take it all off? It’s not like this is something one would need to quickly add and remove all the time…
Also, they did weld a larger diameter pipe to the bucket. It’s just longer than yours would’ve likely been.
Grandpa always did take the annual Tractor Joust competition down at the county fair, just a little too seriously.
KILLDOZER II: son of killdozer.
He is mad and now he has a chainsaw.
So really, this tractor is only good for one thing, unless they remove the contraption every time they’re done fighting zombies.
I’m all for thinking that the zombie problem was big enough that they don’t HAVE to remove the chainsaw.
that super effective!
Battle-Bots Winner!
Photoshopped. blur around the chainsaw handle. some kind of PS touch-up tool was used.
Or someone used a really crappy digital camera to take the picture and the JPG compression was set fairly high, resulting in pixelization.
But it’s very difficult to believe that whoever did this could possibly shop somewhere where they sell crappy digital cameras, like at Wal-Mart, maybe. That’s too much of a stretch of the imagination
dark-to-light transitions never cause problems for JFIF compression. You’re clearly crazy. Also, the windows are clearly photoshopped onto the house, because it’s pixelated around them. And the grass is ‘shopped onto the driveway. This is clearly just a dirt lot with a house that has no windows, and someone took the time to photoshop all of that stuff in.
OMG! its another one of those machines designed to fight off those terrible black rectangles! This guys obviously prepared, oh look, theres one now! :O
For those times when you wouldn’t touch something with a 10-foot pole…unless there was a chainsaw attached to the end.
For the niche market of agoraphobic zombie hunters.
Kid: Dad. cant you walk around the puddle?
Dad: And miss the opportunity to do something that could potentially backfire and kill you? HA! I’d rather take an hour to do this instead.
Kid: I’m going to go ahead and have an ambulance ready for you.
Dad: And i am going to cut you out of this picture.
I can see a face in the fourth window on the second floor
I like how the first pipe is welded onto the bucket. The next is held by a hose/muffler clamp.
And the pice-de-resistance is duct taped!
I’m not sure how the throttle is rigged.
Probably full on.
Start it, and drive around ’till it runs out of gas!
The hose clamp is so the length can be adjusted, since otherwise you’re stuck if you can’t park the tractor in the right place to cut a given branch. With this set up you can cut the branch and have it fall into the bucket so you can take it away easily.
This is a bit long, but it must be this grandpa’s grandson flying a chopper: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KMQgt5YiD0w
really bad photoshop there!
Its a good start on a killdozer, but I think you’ll need more articulation on that arm. And a bulletproof cage of course.
This must be Ash’s vehicle in the next “Army of Darkness.”
Whoa! how did you get pictures to the sequel of Footloose!? Where can I get tickets!?
“Everybody get loose! Footloose!”
Day 955: The rig is almost ready. If i hadn’t used all of my fuel on the flame thrower I’d be driving this baby through those hordes of zombies to safety by now. The search continues…
The day tractor jousting was born.
Finally a way to kill zombies without the risk of getting blood all over your nice overalls
mad max road warrior construction worker?
It’s the protective Monolith from the planet Red-Neck.
this guy is ready for the inevitable upcoming zombie apocalypse.
Yes honey… a brilliant invention… but you are going to have to lift those weights a bit longer so you can reach the chainsaw throttle from the tractor seat!
They’re just preparing for the zombies.
This is the prototype for the zombie-kill 5000, ah, what humble beginnings!
This farmer takes his renaissance faire jousting to the next level. Sir Archibald the Valiant doesn’t stand a chance now…
they’re gettin ready for the zombies
now we’re ready for the zombie appocolipse