Submitted by: aflechtner85 via Submit a Kludge!
Favorite Comment: Fixer JB says, “In 20 years the branches will meet again and make a power-hoop!”
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Rare Footage Of Carnivorous Suburban Tree
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OMG first! Funny dude, that tree’s bound to fall over.
This is yet another excellent planning by the city! Plant the tree right under the hydrolines, or make the hydrolines go right thru the trees!
i think its something to do with the air around the wires that cause the trees to avoid it… theres no way someone would go near one of them to cut a perfect ring…
actually they do cut the trees because they dont want people getting electrocuted from the tree being in the power line and touching the tree. they do this all the time in my town
These trees migrated through Fort Worth a couple of years ago, with annoyed homeowner’s yapping at their roots.
HA HA HA! I was about to say that’s not rare where I live. That happens frequently in the Dallas/Ft. Worth area.
There are a lot of them on Granbury Road between Symphony Hall (Trail Lake) and 8th Avenue.
The Ents are coming! The Ents are coming!
Yeah… they do this to all the trees in Florida for some reason… seems very hurricane safe to me…
Looks like Cookie Monster!
now that’s some phagocytosis.
NOM NOM NOM.
Pac-man has misunderstood the term “going green”.
om nom nom nom nom nom
A triffid offshoot?
Dear Abby-
The love of my life is about to split. I thought we had grown so close together and then I caught her with the gardener! At first I felt like tearing him limb from limb but then I realized she was the root of the problem. All these years I had my head in the clouds so I guess I couldn’t see the forest for the trees. We separated last week but I know she’s going to leave in the spring (she’s already packed her trunk). What should I do? I feel like such a sap!
-Signed “Weeping Willow “
Dear Weeping:
You have every right to be green with envy. I also understand your hesitation to turn over a new leaf. Nevertheless, take a bough for your efforts to lop off your no-longer-blossoming relationship before more suckers show up. Also, try branching out from your current routine. You may find, in a season or two, that chances for a new, budding relationship will shoot up.
Dear Abby,
A while ago, you took a letter from “Weeping Willow,” who was upset by a relationship that was torn asunder by its roots because they grew apart. I was in a similarly charged situation and would like to offer my advice to help them transform their current dilema. You see, I was an electrical contractor who was taken by the beauty of a flower. I pined constantly for her affection. She was the apple of my eye. A true Southern Peach. Oh how I longed for her! But alas, my electric personality was too much for her as I was constantly cutting her down in public. I was able to alternate my energy and direct it to a new outlet. So, you see Weeping Willow, things do work out in the end and come full circuit. So don’t sell yourself short.
Sincerely,
Douglas Fir
WELL DONE! except the minor detail that you ripped it from the Prairie Home Companion. Yeah, you’ve just been called on that.
Dear Abby-
I met this guy on the internet (I’ll call him “Dave”) who has publicly accused me of plagiarism. I’m deeply offended by this, as I work very hard to create original material and would never stoop so low as to claim someone else’s work as my own. Should I let “Dave” get away with his defamatory statements or should I demand he put his money where his mouth is and provide evidence to support his bold claim? I’m counting on the opinion of you and your readers to help me decide.
Signed,
“One and only”
She must have been some piece of ash.
Yeah, but she was quite the birch too.
I approve.
Eh, powerline owners do this all the time. It prevents limbs from breaking off (due to ice or deadness) and taking down the lines. Cheaper than taking down the whole tree, I suppose.
Poster: “This is why we prefer underground utilities, we don’t have to trim around them every year. Signed, Your Power Company.”
What about spending buckets more for repairs when the roots come through the underground cable runs (pipes)? We all know how roots can block sewage lines.
I’m about to take some chemical and/or concrete action against my neighbor’s weeping willow that both hangs over and creeps under my fence. If I don’t, those roots will kill my grass just like his, shift the fenceposts, and destroy my in-ground sprinkler lines.
I’ve lived 32 years in a neighborhood with buried power lines and never had a problem with tree roots interfering with the power lines. Perhaps your hypothetical is just FUD.
As for your neighbor’s tree… I’m pretty sure you have the right to remove any part of the tree that is on your property, but I’m not clear on the legallity of using chemicals that would affect the entire tree. You might want to consult a lawyer before taking action that may land you in court.
Buried power lines are impervious to tree roots, although not to cable-seeking backhoes.
If the tree isn’t *right* next to the fence you can root prune where they come under the fence – dig a trench & underground concrete wall or have sheet steel piling driven to make a wall. Or dig the trench and prune the roots – and re-dig the trench every few years to keep them cut back. Not if it’s too close, or the tree can fall over when it loses half it’s root ball.
Anything you do chemically to kill the roots can kill the whole tree and get you in big trouble. Still *his* tree. Guy next door is pro tree surgeon, he’s BT, DT.
Even trees stay at the Y-M-C-A! Growing leaves in the Y-M-C-A!
Wtf? This was already shown once. Stop posting the same stupid pic on the front page.
link please.
You’re barking up the wrong tree:
http://thereifixedit.com/2009/09/04/epic-kludge-photo-latent-artistic-talent/#comments
We have a whole street of those in my town – I think they’re great.
Power company in our area does this all the time. They even made up a cute name for it – “V-cut trees.” As if you’d want it.
I don’t get it. Do you know the meaning of carnivorous? I see no meat- eating here.
Don’t you see all the birds on the wires? No? …That’s ’cause the trees ATE ‘em!
Yup. Lots of trees like that around here. The power company got a load of cash to trim trees and DIDN’T. Then, after we had outages all over last winter, they got flack for it. (My house was dark for 5 days!) So, they came in this summer and pruned the hell out of everything!
They’ve been pruning like crazy here, too. There’s a perfect half-tree on my drive to work courtesy of the power company. (They trimmed off all the branches on the side facing the line, and left them all on the side facing the road. The poor tree looks like it was cut right in half lengthwise.)
who fired their lazor?
I really hate it when they butcher trees like that. They should just cut the whole tree down. The City gets a super fail.
12′-4″ means 12′-4′
P.S. The power company can only clear their lines not cut the trees down. Urban green spacers rule without clarity.
I wish they wouldn’t mutilate the trees, and bury the lines instead.
Burying lines only costs four times as much as stringing them aerially. Upsizing the power lines as loads grow only costs about six times as much. Adding a new fiber or a cable line when you want broadband to your house, As long as you are the first one in the neighborhood and the pipes are already buried and empty and run from where they have to connect to where you want to hook up.
Piece of cake.
When Joe Bob and his backhoe decides to install a new gasline and pulls up the power conduits. It should only take a couple of days to repair and replace the ripped out lines. Not to mention avoiding all of the previously buried services anytime you need to repair anything.
Go ahead and bury everything!
So, one-time expenses are higher and you have to coordinate maintenance (which is done successfully all the time anyway) and all we get in return is more reliable and safer electric service? Yeah, I see why you think that’s a bad deal.
And we’ve just heard from Larry, the Union Rep for the Aerial Line Gang…
Smart power and phone companies put in extra ducts, and plan for another layer on top later – and they are encased in a foot of red-tinted concrete to keep the idiots with backhoes away.
And State Laws say that Joe-Bob hits the power lines, he pays for the damages. There are “One Call” locating services nationwide (usually Dial 811), and they tell you roughly where you have to switch to hand digging. And you still use a reeeeeal delicate touch with that backhoe dipper.
$100,000 repair bills tend to make sure you don’t do that twice. Unless your Daddy owns the Plumbing company and can’t get up the nerve to fire you or kick you off the backhoe…
Saw that only once – I must have patched the phone cables back together in that same 200-house subdivision a dozen times, and I was in the trench after the Power and CATV companies got done.
The power company would LOVE to just cut the trees down. They only have to pay for that once! They have to pay for trimming every few years. And, it costs almost as much as taking the whole tree out. It’s obnoxious property owners like me who actually *like* trees that stand in their way… almost literally at times.
It is still a large tree, just not a beautiful tree. It gives all of the other benefits of being a large tree. It still has the same sized root system, so the freshly exposed branches will leaf out quickly to provide the same sized, but different shaped canopy. The usual collection of birds and small mammals will call the tree home. It will help moderate the temperature, absorb CO2, produce oxygen.
It will just be ugly.
Live with it.
In 20 years the branches will meet again and make a power-hoop!
We’ll meet on the other side of the lines!
They do this in my town all the time. I saw a tree once with one puny branch of one side and the whole rest of what was left of the tree on the other. Wouldn’t it have been easier to completely take one side off?
Then the tree will be unbalanced with a large sail area on one side. A good stiff wind will then uproot the tree.
Actually it’s pretty pathetic. Normal trees get cut like this because power lines are positioned over property lines or easement boundaries. A lot of times volunteer trees come up along a fence, then they grow up big enough to interfere with the power lines and you get this.
Oh, Centerpoint Energy wreaks this type of horror on trees everywhere it goes. We’re used to it in Houston and surrounding areas. Please, please, will nobody come and save us from the Evil Centerpoint Tree Mutilators? Where’s Superman? Heck, we’d even settle for Spidey or the Hulk!
House Divided.
OM NOM NOM NOM.
I see that Progressive Energy has been landscaping again.
“Alrighty then, I think that finishes the job!” -two sides of tree suddenly fall to the ground, detached from root- “…I’m suing the Super-Glue company.”
If people planted trees somewhere besides under the power lines, there would be no need for this.
The sad part is that on a day like today (60 mph wind gusts – the last one just shook the building and it’s a HUGE building) nothing’s going to help. We had a power glitch about an hour ago that killed the internal network, although we just got an outside connection back. Still no internal or site-to-site phones, either.
Half of New Orleans looks like this. After Katrina, the tree trimmers had a lot of work, and no residents were around to complain about the butchering. So they did some wacky stuff to the trees that were left.
Aww, it looks like the tree is about to give the powerlines a big hug.
Poor tree. And people say EM-fields from power lines are harmless…
(Yes, I know, but my way’s funnier.)
I work for a utility and that is how the spec shows to trim trees in way of primary voltage distribution lines, a 10′ radius around. The tree trimmer guys stuck to the letter of the spec. I’ll bet you that not a twig or leaf is less than 10′ away or they’ll have to bring out the 30 MW laser again.
That tree looks power hungry.
What town is this? I think I recognize it.
Which third world country is that with cables in the air instead of underground?
I don’t know why this is so weird. He was feeling a little sluggish, so he downed a 5 Hour Energy… so what?!
or it could possibly form the all-mighty ring of power!
OMG WHERES CHARLIE BROWN!
Correction: This is the State Tree of New Jersey.
So we must think of the task ahead as ours alone. We believe now that we can see our way, but there is still a lot of work and research to be done before the day when we, or our children, or their children, will cross the narrow straits on a great crusade to drive the triffids back and back with ceaseless destruction until we have wiped out the last one of them from the face of the land that they have usurped.
There is a sign missing:
Beware! If you steal electricity from the power net,
the tree will seek revenge!!
Another 4 1/2 rings, and the town council will finally be able to put in their bid to host the Olympics.
took me a moment to figure this one out, but after a second i saw the mouth in the tree.