
Submitted by: dunno source via Submit a Kludge!
Favorite Comment(s): Today we have a story for you. Started by Fixer Blackmoore, “Thomas however wasn’t paying attention to the track, and went down the wrong switch and into the poles. “OUCH!” cried Thomas, but it was too late – he had already smashed into the poles, and was hit by the live electric wires.”
Then Fixer Josh says, “Bust my buffers!” said Thomas.”
To which Fixer Blackmoore replies, “At the same time Edward was approaching for the adjacent track. “Get out of the way!” he screamed. He too crashed into the poles, Thomas and live wires. Then the coal caught a spark and started into flames.“Mr. Top Hat Is not going to like this” thought Thomas.”
Followed By Fixer Crack OS, “His suspicion was later confirmed when The Fat Controller himself arrived. “You have caused confusion and delay!” snapped Sir Topham. Meanwhile, Gordon was thundering down the line, unaware of the mess in front of him. “I am the fastest and greatest,” he said to himself proudly.”
With a startling conclusion by Fixer Alleycat, “Gordon did not see the mess in front of him and smashed into the back of Edward. Sir Topham Hat was very cross and ordered Thomas, Edward, and Gordon smelted down and turned into pinball machine parts. Upon further investigation, Bulgy, who had been waging war on the railroads for a number of years, was able to conspire with Harold, Bertie, and Cranky to have the poles placed in the middle of the tracks. Sir Topham Hat ordered the conspirators smelted down as well. With no modern transportation available anymore, The Island of Sodor’s economy collapsed. The island sunk into the sea a number of years later.”
-
-
Copy & paste this:


ha ha… so what is this supposed to do… lolz…
Baffle people who can then express their lack of insight on some website or other.
I hate to say it, but this is not a kludge. I’m actually surprised it made it on to the site. This is clearly an old abondonded track (note the grass growing through it and the rusted tracks) that they just didn’t bother to pull up and built something else on top of it.
I wouldn’t be so sure of the ‘old’: unused track can look worse than this in under a year.
Is it -really- that expensive to take those old tracks up and use the materials for new tracks?
It costs more to pay someone to remove the track than to leave it where it is. You’ll find sections of unused, disconnected track like this in just about every railyard.
Nope, it’s not an abandonded track at all, because it doesn’t seem to be a real track at all. The track on the right is buried and the track in the middle is just lying on the ground.
Are we looking at the same picture? There’s a buried track? And where the hell do you see a middle track? I see six sets of tracks, none of them buried. And the track in the middle for six sets of tracks? I guess it’s the gravel between tracks 3 and 4? Of course it’s just laying there on the ground! It /IS/ the ground
The tracks on the right aren’t buried, they have ballast, crushed stone or coarse gravel, packed between the sleepers, and you can see that the ballast slopes down on the side to the sand surface which the sleepers for the track in the middle are lying on top of. So the track down the middle of the photo has either been laid down but not packed with ballast before the need arose to put those poles there, requiring the removal of a few sleepers, or it’s actually been planned and laid like this, and further work is waiting for the removal of these poles. very likely carrying trusses for the overhead wires (look in the background).
These where perfectly valid tracks (just not used to often) until a giant came by, felt like inhaling two Marlboros and putting the stump out in the sand.
which comes first the track ot the pole??
@kyle Obviously the rooster.
Conjunction junction, what’s you’re disfunction?
“What is your major malfunction?!”
I create train wreck for Phrases, clauses, and what not.
My major malfunction is that I did my own kludge with my grammar! LOL
If I had taken the photo, I would have polished the tracks to a shine on one side of the posts.
and you thought we were confused now…
Um,lemme guess: Paul Bunyan? On stilts, right?
Thomas however wasn’t paying attention to the track, and went down the wrong switch and into the poles. “OUCH!” cried Thomas, but it was too late – he had already smashed into the poles, and was hit by the live electric wires.
“Bust my buffers!” said Thomas.
At the same time Edward was approaching for the adjacent track. “Get out of the way!” he screamed. He too crashed into the poles, Thomas and live wires. Then the coal caught a spark and started into flames.
“Mr. Top Hat Is not going to like this” thought Thomas.
His suspicion was later confirmed when The Fat Controller himself arrived. “You have caused confusion and delay!” snapped Sir Topham.
Meanwhile, Gordon was thundering down the line, unaware of the mess in front of him. “I am the fastest and greatest,” he said to himself proudly.
Gordon did not see the mess in front of him and smashed into the back of Edward. Sir Topham Hat was very cross and ordered Thomas, Edward, and Gordon smelted down and turned into pinball machine parts. Upon further investigation, Bulgy, who had been waging war on the railroads for a number of years, was able to conspire with Harold, Bertie, and Cranky to have the poles placed in the middle of the tracks. Sir Topham Hat ordered the conspirators smelted down as well. With no modern transportation available anymore, The Island of Sodor’s economy collapsed. The island sunk into the sea a number of years later.
The Internet, destroying my childhood one site at a time.
The forgotten island of Sodor, now known widely as atlantis, was recently discovered by a team under the leadership of Dr. Robert Ballard. Upon finding this sunken island, the common idea that this was an ancient civilization was quickly rejected upon finding many old rusted pinball machines. One of which Said “I am the finest and greatest pinball machine”.
And the best bit is that this story was better than anything The Rev W Awdry every wrote.
Parents everywhere rejoiced.
This whole thread was a hysterical! LOL
Holy crap!!! And here I thought I had too much time on MY hands!!!
It’s even funnier if you hear the whole thing in Ringo Starr’s voice as “Mr Conductor”
toddlers everywhere cried not realizing this was a positive improvement to their childhood
Choo Choo!!! Next stop, Death!
Someone wasn’t trained in proper pole placement.
I think there is a big court battle between the Railroad and the Electric company over the Right of Way. I wonder who will win.
Looks like two different “shovel ready” federal projects at odds with each other.
Your gubmint at work
*in a Far West bandit accent*
Okay Billy. I’m gonna tell ya this one mor’ time. When we rob a train, we place the poles horizontally on the tracks. Got it?
Hi, we’re from the government and we’re here to help you.
The nine scariest words in the English language. Thank you Ronald Reagan!
haha
When trains race this is the track where the pole-sitter starts
And then the Wile E Coyote placed poles to stop the roadrunners train heading to kludgeville.
this might just be from Romania
I guess the train can’t get “nailed” by engine sludge…
As most others said, it’s not a kludge. This is a “fallen flaga” (abandoned tracks). The people who installed to poles did a nice job in taking the two ties (supports) out to make room. Where’s the humor? Fail.
Of course they are abandoned tracks. There’s a post right in the middle of them. How are the trains supposed to pass?
You do realize one sentence of your post doesn’t match the other? lol. One of these things is not like the other… sing it with me! Abandoned = no trains on those tracks anymore.
“fallen flag”… typo
Looks like concrete ties. Strange that they would be used with such light rail.
They _are_ concrete ties. And it’s perfectly valid to use them with light rail for any number of reasons.
Minneapolis, Minnesota: Concrete ties on the “light rail transit” line, almost completely end-to-end.
I rode it opening day, and enjoy a ride whenever I’m there and get the chance. Don’t know who built/assembled the track but the trains are a variant of Bombardier Flexity Swift (low-floor) with integral snowplow.
big words…
Ok, its abandoned, out-of-order tracks. But where TF was this pic taken (I think europe, as it seems to be europe standard tracks (1435mm between the rails))?! I can deny that it wasn’t taken in Germany, due to the electricity system. hmm.. :-O
I’m thinking they might be in Poland.
Hahahahahahaha…I thought I was seeing double for some reasons but I can see it clearly now! It’s CFR ROMANIA! hahahahahaha
unfortunately not Romania, the poles are not painted like cygarette butts, they’re just plain concrete
mystery of the train that was ‘delayed’ for 6 years: solved
When poles decide to do love suicides, it isn’t pretty for anyone involved…
In a ground-breaking international trade agreement, foreign train drivers were allowed to transport cargo trains across the border, up to an agreed boundary point, where the goods would then be transferred to a locally driven carriages.
Looks like some Polish railways.
“As long as the train hits 88 miles an hour and those poles give us 1.21 gigawatts of electricity, we don’t need anymore track!” Dr. Emmett Brown
OMG. I have a two year old boy. The story totally made sense to me.
easily the best story ever
its amazing how much so many grown adults know about thomas the tank engine
Somewhere, someplace, a permit for this was approved.
its can be only in Russia!!!!
Only Doc Brown’s ‘Jules Verne Train’ can travel on this track when timed right.
this.is.a.sign.
that the world is coming to a end