This Will Only End In Tears
Submitted By: Jimbo C
Favorite Comment: Fixer Daniel says, “Talk about drunk with power. A man with a bag of zip ties and a broken something. They should restrict sales of zip ties to max 5 per customer per day.”
« Previous For The True Wine Connoisseur | Like It Never Even Broke Next »
Add this to your blog:
» 75 Kludgers Kludging
-
Jury Riggers Unite!
s1500 on Historical Thursday: London St… s1500 on My Kludgy Sprinkler tommasz on Sharing This Light of Min… Pi-tastic on My Kludgy Sprinkler JBD on Historical Thursday: London St… jaymze on Let’s Hear It For Andy Bert on Van and Apprentice Van DS on Sharing This Light of Min… ad fogg on The Legend of Hammewrench xMidnightDreamsx on Let’s Hear It For Andy -
Not a F1 mechanic…Jesus Christ!!!
shock split….
reminds me of a guy I knew that replaced a shock with a length of 2×4 lumber
Some people shouldn’t be allowed to use cable ties on the grounds that: A. They haven’t a clue how to use them, and B. they don’t know when they have enough of a good thing.
Actually, that’s a great use for cable ties!
What are those clamps hanging down from the top of the picture for? They’re not actually anchoring the spring to the frame, are they?
This is the stuff Darwin Awards are made of.
At first I was going to ask just what the hell I’m looking at here (where is Mr. Evilwrench when you need him?), but on second thought, I don’t think I want to know…
That’ll do Pig. That’ll do.
I can’t get my mind wrapped around this kludge!
those clamps appear to be (temporarily) compressing the spring – pulling it upwards while the splint is being installed.
Errr…. This is the thing my mechanic would definitely do…You should see the amount of clamps he putted on one of my GPL tubs that broke
Looking at this I think it’s not a permanent solution. The picture is taken at night, so probably the “pot” that holds the spring up – broke, so he rebuild it on the spot. By putting vertical support beams, and only hold them together with the zip ties. It should run a few miles to the repair shop.
The only thing bothers me is where did he finds all those tools to make this kind of repair
“Honey, where’s my duct tape?” “Sorry dear – you used it all fixing the roof… I’ve got some wire ties here if you need some.” “Aw thanks Hon, you’re the best!”
Talk about drunk with power. A man with a bag of zip ties and a broken something. They should restrict sales of zip ties to max 5 per customer per day.
and they have to give a reasonable explaination of what they plan to do with those five zip ties.. in essay form.
This guy has more zip-ties than sense!
Good example of McGiever at work. One quick fix for a tire rub & broken shock until the welfare comes in. Might work until that first big pot hole commin in to the trailer park and all his handy work will be for nothing.
I am with “!vo” on this one. This actually might last more than a few miles. One of the movies I use to watch growing up was about a Jeep named Jezebel that was used in animal conservation and they would have to do things like this. One that sticks out in my mind is watching them using a tree to repair an axle.
@Carlo Nope, they are just compressing the spring so the A-! mechanic can make the needed repairs.
Does that shock have wood grain on it? Is that a baseball bat? No wonder it broke! Is this a kludge to fix a kludge? What happens when the cable ties start to fail? Wrap the whole thing in duct tape?
Those are clamps compressing the spring. Maybe meant to stay, but they make putting wood into the suspension easier, I imagine.
Why not use metal straps that might actually not dry out and break lioek the tie-wraps will?
The zip ties really are not the scary part here, that worst that would happen is that they break and he ends up right back where he was (with the broken suspension).
The clamps he’s using to compress the spring however, are terrifying. Even real mechanics have died using real tools to compress the springs when replacing shocks. If one of those bolts sheers he could easily be looking at an emergency room or morgue visit.
Wait a minute, what is that even SUPPOSED to be? o.O
I’m shocked that he didn’t spring for a better method. He auto know better; I wood.
Hey ma! i think i fixed your hydrolics.
Thats a Hillbilly lift kit.
“This Will Only End In Tears” if he has any functioning eyes left after it breaks.
@Demetrius
The baseball bat is connected to the suspension’s swing arm.
I’m sure pot was involved in this repair but not in the sense you’re thinking.
@dono1
♪♫
And, the swing arm’s connected to the… wood splint
And, the wood splint’s connected to the… zip tie!
And hear the Word of the Lord.
♫♪
sad *cries*
I was trying to hash out the splints but I believe you may be spot on! The spring perch/bucket broke and he is propping it up with the splint using the clamps to compress the spring enough to make the repair! I was a Certified Frame & Front-end mechanic for years and never saw such as that!
Better too many zip ties than too few; you don’t want the kludge to fail prematurely. I wouldn’t want to hit a pothole with that thing, but it can probably limp to a mechanic.
as soon as he loosens the spring compressors, the ties and wooden dowels are gonna pop off.
@lizardqueen
Pffft! Duct tape is *so* last year!
@Hero Hog
I coulda done with that sort of kit when trying to replace the drum brake shoes on my first car. No-one ever said those springs were so tough. Had to call for strong friends in the end…
Protip: Don’t work on your car in the day if you have to go to work that evening.
Independent thought on this:
Some ricers will do anything to stiffen up their suspension for that “trackday car” feel…
Those words should never be in a sentence together. Ever.
*shudder*
silly person .. everyone knows you need to use duct tape when rigging your suspension
What really tops off the awesomeness of this picture is the use of the 5# sledge as a jack stand.
@Anna Rexia
I know, right? I mean, a 4# would have been just as good.
@funwitheverything
Its a picture of a broken suspension that is being “rednecked” fixed by using a baseball bat and zip-ties
Also notice a wooden stick used to hold the car up
I shudder to imaging what would happen if that wooden stick broke while he was fixing it
It appears a lot of effort was expended lining up all the zip ties but not so much on the physics.
Do you suppose zip tying a crow bar to it would be better?
It looks like…a Tool video.
No doubt a lot of extra effort lining up the zip ties- it looks quite professional, really. Hopefully he clipped the excess off and gave the job a nice finished look.
Zip ties are the new duct tape.
Only end in tears? No, no, no. This could easily end in fiery death instead.
@Bogus Exception
Maybe some metal hose clamps would work, but those are more costly than the zip ties. I like it. Serious knucklehead creativity……
@uncchris: …which leads to tears. See?
Holy heck! I’m gone one day and miss *this* mess! I took a year of mechanics in high school, and although the engines have changed to where I pretty much don’t recognize anything anymore, I do recognize this. Fer cryin’ out loud, call a buddy and get a ride to work and wait till your next paycheck. Is it really worth risking your life? I applaud your creativity, but not at the risk of yourself and the traffic around you. *facepalm*
@Hero Hog live and learn.
@dono1 I was sure you’d say that
A movie called a Jeep named Jezebel eh? All my googling has proved futile. A bit like this repair.
I once had a friend ask if I had some extra clamps to hold his broken rear shock tower back on. I begged off, not wanting to be part of such a scenario..
I knew somebody who once had their transmission connected to their shifter via zip ties.
Hurray for the ghetto mechanic.
@Rod
Shame on you. The correct answer to that is “Let me go get my camera first”
“Honey can you hand me some of those shock-ties? They’re in the drawer next to the wire ties…”
One of my friends had clamps like those he kept on the car, meant to lower the ride height. Maybe the ghetto lowering busted the (shock?, wood?) in the first place.
Yeah. mmhmm. yeah okaay. Huhm. vrrmmm vrrmmm. Kthump. SNAP! Pinnng. Uh well…..we made it another hundred yard hon. I think I’m gonna run out of tie wraps before we get home.
I miss having a Volkswagen.
piece of shit (snap)
@tash
Ah, that’s not so bad… I’d have much appreciated some zipties the time the one tiny bolt in charge of transmitting the side-to-side motion thru my shift linkage decided to quit and left me with only 3rd and 4th. In a hilly area. With a very underpowered engine. Links like that don’t require very high quality fittings… just more than the pewter items put on at the factory (zipties probably stronger…)
@Hunter C. Coch
Lol … thats exactly what my anti-christine (slow, unshowy, spontaneously broke itself, too slow to kill anyone – but regardless, still “unkillable”) was. VW: core mechanicals bomb-proof, all the accessory bits made out of cheddar. Right down to the pedal box…
clearly you guys have never been 20 miles from county road in boondocks and had a shock fail use what you have make it home … been there done that
oh yeah we use hay twine and mesquite limb ..
I actually know the back story here: Up in rural northern Minnesota on Labor Day, my friend’s right rear strut collapsed. How do you get a strut for a long out of production VW on a holiday in the middle of nowhere? You don’t, so you buy four toilet plungers, two dozen zip ties, baling wire, and a roll of duct tape. A little “engineering” and a Hail Mary later, it made the (very, very slow!) 170+ mile drive back to Minneapolis. Those springs are ridiculously weak,too- almost compressible by hand.
This repair was made -at night- on a logging road. It wasn’t done yet when the photo was taken. The strut was properly replaced the next day.
It’s both win and fail at the same time.
Cha ya I have actually had a similar occurance when my rear shocks broke loose on a old Chevy Monza. I just drove it that way wondering what the hell was that noise and why the hell is my car all over the road and bouncing like that.
The way it was set up though I had a garage weld a steel plate back over the holes and drilled them out to take the bolts.
That shock- OOPH! -is better- GRUNT! -than ever!- FOOM! And those- WHAM! -goddam potholes are- CRACK! ****! -bigger than- CRUNCH! -ever!
In ziptie, we trust…!
I stand here in awe! this is the Mother of all McGuivers
JENGA!
AHHHHH!!!! MY ARMS!!!!!!!
Store bought lift kits are for chumps!!!
you should see how he lowered his honda
I agree with some of the above – I think this is probably just a temporary trail fix, meant to limp home or to a mechanic. Sometimes when your truck is stuck in the woods, you have to get creative and then get real spare parts later.
Soon to be seen in your rear view mirror. Jesus.
That explains why the guy who broke into my work truck only stole the zip ties